Struggling to get motivated? How might the power of fun and play help empower you?

This morning a client cancelled their session, again. They hadn’t done their homework. And coming to the session without having done the homework feels bad. It feels like wasted progress. Better reschedule when the homework has been done, next week, maybe…

I know well from my classical music training, how it feels to arrive at your lesson without having practised. I viscerally remember the sinking shame as you fumble your way through your pieces, feeling your teacher’s beleaguered eyes boring into you. There is no hiding lack of practice.

So why don’t we practice? Even when it’s something we love and are passionate about, like music or dancing, painting or dare I say it… public speaking? And no, in most cases it isn’t for want of time (I see you 6 hour/day phone usage).

I think in part it is because we have decided, consciously or unconsciously, that the activity is not FUN. I mean we even call it homeWORK. Who wants some more work on top of their already sky-high workload? No? Whyever not?

When a voice within us mutters, ‘I must do this or else’, ‘I’ve got to do this’, we begin to associate the activity, no matter how joyful, with a tiresome nag who makes us suffer. Let’s call that nagging voice ‘Yada-yada’. Yada-yada tells we must, we should, we ought to, we need to.

But the nag Yada-yada is boring; a damp squib; a grey puddle; a voice to avoid. Therefore, as helpful as their intentions may seem towards motivating you, this is what Yada-yada will ultimately do to you:

  • Kill your creativity
  • Obliterate your productivity

But how can we get motivated without this nag telling us what to do? Well, I invite you to cultivate a new inner voice that centres FUN and PLAY.

Consider the following two statements:

  • Today you have to do 20 minutes practice.
  • Today you get to play with contrasting forms of vocal expression

The difference is subtle but important. The first we associate with obligation, productivity, failure/success, or ‘achievement’; the other is an invitation to something pleasurable and potentially fun. Which, therefore, are you more likely to act on?

Play allows for fun, pleasure, self-expression, and crucially, the opportunity to completely suck at something without it mattering; it inspires a repeat session. Obligation in the other hand, is suffocating, uninspiring and, even if effective in the short-term, will ultimately kill productivity.

And so, as a coach my job is to consider how I can incorporate more play and fun into the tasks I set. For a start, I am changing the word ‘homework’ to ‘homeplay’.

For yourself, you might cultivate a more fun, motivating, inner-voice by considering: How can I bring an element of play into this task? In which ways can I bring elements of play into the pursuit of my goals?

You might simply ask yourself, ‘is this fun?’ And if the answer is no consider, ‘how can I make it fun’?

Improvement and learning don’t need to be tied to suffering. Focus on play instead, and watch your progress flourish.